It's been a long time...

But there's been so much that's blog worthy, and I just haven't had time to write it down.

So yesterday night, I stumbled upon this verse.

²³ “I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but not everything is constructive. ²⁴ No one should seek their own good, but the good of others.

NO ONE should seek their own good, but the good of others.

This is ridiculously hard, especially in my own life.

I've been thinking about what kind of job to pursue.

What would make my family happy?

What would allow me to have a family?

What would not be wasting my Dartmouth education??

And it's been torturing me for a while.

I felt as if I was really flailing my arms on a stage, having no direction or purpose.

It was hard to study, because I had no purpose for it.

But this verse.

I don't know what it is about it.

But I realized how much of me were in the questions-- how selfish my questions were.

If God wants me to do everything for the good of others, then this makes my decision somewhat easier.

I must study for the good of others.

I must love for the good of others.

I must learn to take God's discipline for the good of others.

I could be totally wrong, but finally, I feel like I'm going somewhere.